Monday, January 26, 2009
No Choice
From the time I found out I was pregnant, it was very important to me to be able to breastfeed my child, and I knew that I wanted to do it for at least the first 3 months until I went back to work. Then I was challenged by one of the lactation nurses to continue as I went back to work, and I thought "okay, maybe I can", so I had it set in my mind that I could do this. I have been doing so well at work, pumping every 4 hours, and cutting my lunches to 5 minutes so I could pump, and I was happy to do this. So, today is a sad day for me. No one can explain the bond between mother and child during breastfeeding, but it is very rewarding to know that your body is providing for your child. However, yesterday I came down with a horrible stomach bug that totally knocked me out. I was throwing up continuously and continued to throw up after there was nothing else to throw up. Therefore, I was unable to even feed my son or pump from 2pm until I finally got the strength at 1 am. However, I believe my body was so dehydrated that I was only able to produce 4.5 ounces, and from hear on out it went downhill, and although I have tried to pump every 2 hours, I am afraid my milk production is gone. It's very hard to know that yesterday at 2 pm was the last time I could breastfeed my little guy, but I guess he is just growing up. I know this sounds silly to be upset about, but I really wanted to make it to 6 months, and to know I was only 3 weeks away. Oh well, I did a great job, and I am proud of myself. I am just a little worried about how Mr. Man will respond, but so far he doesn't even know the difference:) Just needed to vent. By the way, during this horrible puke fest, I forgot to mention that Michael was out of town, and Asher had nothing but an out of commission parent, but he was such a good little boy and entertained himself while I laid in the fetal position next to him. Thank the Lord for that, what a good little guy:)
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3 comments:
I am so proud of you for breastfeeding as long as you did. As much as you and I want to have EVERYTHING planned out, there is a reason why things don't go as planned. God knows what he is doing. You have given Asher so much for doing it this long. I know what you mean by having that bonding time while breastfeeding. Just know that that bond is still there whether you are breastfeeding or not. There is nothing like a bond between a mother and a son and it grows even deeper with each passing day.
Aw, hang in there if you can Rachael :) You might still be dehydrated and your milk production hasn't recovered yet. It may still come back. Nearly six months of breastfeeding is SO great and it is awesome that you've stuck it out even when you have had to go back to work. So many people don't make it that long. Know that you have done so much good for Asher by breastfeeding him the past six months that he couldn't haven gotten anywhere else. You're a great mama :)
Hi Rachael! OH MY WORD: Could Asher be any cuter???!!! He is the cutest!!
You've done a great thing nursing Asher as long as you did! Many women give up and you didnt (even at work!!)! You have every right to be proud of yourself for nursing him for this long!!! Great Job Mommy Rach!!
~Blair
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